Saturday, May 03, 2014

Where are all the real men?...

At work the other day we were talking about the guys we see when going out clubbing and how many of them are wearing make up and pluck their eyebrows better than us ladies. With male role models like the cast of 'The only way is Essex' is it any wonder though? Plus as women fight for equality I can't help thinking we're stepping on guys toes and further blurring the lines of what makes a man, well......a man.

A member of my family recently changed his name to something more gender neutral as he says he doesn't feel particularly masculine or feminine.  Looking at today's culture I can totally see why someone might feel that way and looking at what society portrays as manhood I'm kinda glad he doesn't fit that mould.

It seems to me that most men today fall in to one of these two categories:

- very well groomed, in touch with their 'feminine' side, big softies and as a result get called gay regardless of whether they are or not.
- guys who are so worried about being called gay that they go to the other extreme - acting like thugs and having questionable personal hygiene.

I don't think either of these are what "real" men are supposed to be.

The media seems to tell everyone that real men don't cry, don't care about personal hygiene, don't talk about their problems, treat women like garbage and always solve things with their fists. When I read the Bible I see a very different picture of manhood and surely the God who created man should be the one who we look to for our definition of what true manhood is, not Hollywood?!

The Bible shows us men who aren't afraid to cry (John 11:35, Matthew 26:75) and men who have very close friendships with other guys without fear of being called gay (1 Samuel 18:1-3). I could sit here and give you a whole list of what the Bible has to say about manhood but that would be too easy for you - go look for yourself!

While researching this topic I came across some interesting articles about the question of manhood. This video challenges us about the damage our wrong message of manhood is doing to our boys. This article raises the issue of the disservice we do to our children, both boys and girls, when we avoid the question of gender altogether and try to treat male and female as interchangeable. For a whole sermon series on the subject go on over to Desiring God.

This article about "Peter Pan Syndrome" addresses a slightly different element of how manhood has gone wrong in today's society but gets right to the heart of it all when it says...

In short, to “act like men”, means, to act like the Man. We must see that we are being transformed into the very image of the God-Man, of Jesus Christ (Rom. 8:29). 

Are you a guy trying to work out what it means to be a man? Or are you someone confused about your gender or identity? Let me assure you that the only label that really defines you is not male/female/gay/straight/geek/jock etc etc - you are quite simply a child of God. If we all let our Father in heaven define us instead of the media and those around us the world would be a much less confusing place for us all!


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