So, there's a few things going round my mind at the minute. A friend of mine text me the other day saying he feels lost and lonely and like he's going round in circles looking for purpose and love but all he gets is pain and disappointment. I bet we can all relate to this to some degree.
I think the one thing for me that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning is the prospect of having meaningful connections with people. When I get to chat about life, about meaning, about dreams, about stupid things, about opinions, about faith - that's what makes me feel really alive. And when I seem to lack those deep connections I feel deeply unhappy. But the irony in my life is that though I crave connections I tend to shy away from them too - I have a strange habit of keeping people at arms length and doing my own thing. Why do I do that?! Where does it come from?
And then there's the temptation to look for those connections in the wrong places and end up trying to depend on people who aren't able to live up to our expectations. And there's times when I get close to people (perhaps a friend, perhaps a potential partner) and get excited at the deep connection that's developing but then something goes wrong (they move away, we drift apart, they turn out to not be the right partner for me etc.) and I end up in pain and disappointed once again!
How can this cycle be broken? I know the answer lies with God and his unfailing love - that's what I need most. But how do I experience the fullness of His love and how do I learn to be satisfied in Him and only Him?
And one more thing - a friend of mine who's not a Christian has been struggling with this need for connection and is aware that he's going round in circles and needs to experience God's love but the more he tries, the more he feels likes he's hitting a brick wall. Why? Why has God revealed himself to people who aren't looking for him and not to people like my friend who are aware of their need for him? It doesn't seem right!! How can my friend break this cycle and meet with God? After all, experiencing God isn't something we can choose, it's something God does by his grace. I find it so hard to sit back and watch my friend hurting and struggling to find God and wish I could just wave a magic wand and make it happen but I can't and it breaks my heart!!! :(
We all seek others for we are looking for ourselves. (btw, this why I wrote this on my blog http://thedustylens.blogspot.com/2008/03/reflections.html )
ReplyDeleteThe circle is easily broken: don't be afraid. Reach out and accept that even though we struggle with our differences in beliefs and hopes, the flame of God burns in everyone, with an intensity not necessarily related to the display of "religiousness".
Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. You have such a talent for using words in a beautiful and thought provoking manner. I particularly love your comment that 'the flame of God burns in everyone with an intensity not necessarily related to the display of religiousness.' That is so true - in fact often 'religiousness' seems to dull the flame of God within people!
ReplyDeleteHey stace.
ReplyDeleteA while back, Char & I were watching the film "The Fountain" with a group of Uni friends. The film is a story about love, life, death, faith, spirituality..
We both sat deeply emersed in its themes, but our friends really didnt. Later, Char & I chatted at length about the film... and then we both had this feeling of, where are the people we can have conversations like this with? The people we can really connect with on a deeper, spiritual level?
I guess what I'm saying is, I relate to your desire for deep connections. And I know I'm missing them in my own life.
They do help us know ourselves more; give us a platform to explore, question, be challenged. This also means we're not alone.
As it goes with your "rant", well I'm no expert. I struggle in searching out God for myself! But I guess God's work & timing is a great mystery and a law unto itself. But rest assured it is good and right. The old testament promise springs to mind, that when the Lord is sought with all the heart, he will be truely found.
Love God, love people, right?
All easier said than done, we all lament together.
Hey pete
ReplyDeleteGood to hear from you!! You're one of those great people in my life that i can have those deep chats with and connect with in a meaningful way. I miss having guys like you and nai and tom maccoy in my life. It was a great year when i had you all around to bounce thoughts off of and I feel like I don't have many people like you guys in my life right now - time to go seek some out!!
I agree that God knows what he doing and his timing is perfect and even more strongly agree that all this stuff is easier said than done!!!!!
Hope you're well?